I am kaitco

a writer's log

Not 21 anymore Thursday, July 21, 2011

Between the ages of 19 and 21 and I developed a somewhat healthy obsession with Dance Dance Revolution. My friends and I would play the various games all the time and I eventually introduced my family to it and showed them how it was “meant” to be played. At one point, I could do most of the songs on DDR Max on the hardest setting and still finish without failing and the majority of my daily exercise surrounded playing DDR in Workout mode to burn through 1000+ calories in the game.

Tonight, after close to 6 months without doing any real physical activity, I decided it was time to work out a little and, since this desire has only come a few weeks after I finally cancelled my gym membership, I decided to play through 500 calories worth of DDR songs. I learned something fascinating after the first song, however…I am not 21 anymore.

I stopped being simply out of shape years ago and have metamorphosed into something entirely new. I got through my workout, but wow! Six months of inactivity can make you just plain delirious after a while.

I wrote 418 words tonight (close proximity to my neck with scissors) and I’m starting to delve into some more really interesting character development. Brit cutting Damen’s hair is one of those scenes that came to me early in the notes of the novel and has developed almost entirely unchanged over the past couple years; I’m excited to finally “write” it.

As I approach the end of July, I’m starting to get the urge to set some fantastic goals, but I wonder if I’m stretching a little too far. After my recent piano failure, I’m loathe to pick up a new hobby, but this goal-setting itch just must be scratched. I’m leaning between upping my word count to a 300-word minimum a day and something crazy like working out every day, but I recognize the good thing I’ve got going for me. My 250-word minimum has not failed me these past months, even on days when I was ready to thrown in the proverbial towel or give up on Damen entirely and since I’ve worked out tonight for the first time since at least February if not longer, I’m not sure I’m ready to throw myself back into an exercise regimen that I’m just going to quit in a few weeks.

I suppose I’ve got the rest of the month to decided; these are just some ideas floating around in the end since I’m still a bit dizzy from that workout.

 

Restless Heart Syndrome Wednesday, June 1, 2011

by Green Day ~ 21st Century Breakdown

I’ve not been this sleepy so “early” in the night in quite a while, so this will be quick.

I’ve got to find a better way to manage bad news and a better way to manage stress. If it means that I come home and write immediately or play Rock Band until I forget about the bad things or watch some of my favorite Frasier episodes until I can’t focus on anything else…then so be it.

On the positive side, I managed to accomplish my June goal for the first day of the month. I did spend about five minutes playing scales with my eyes closed as I tried to wake up myself, when I clearly needed more sleep. Hopefully, tomorrow will fair well as I’ve got to be up far earlier in the morning for first-job….blargh…

I wrote 367 words tonight (unintentionally appropriate concern about his departure) and I’m a little ridiculously obsessed with Green Day’s music for the moment. This too will pass, but until then I’ll keep fine tuning my new playlist as I play this post’s title song and Little Girl over and over and over again, occasionally playing Peacemaker to liven up things…

 

707 Tuesday, May 24, 2011

I think I like this concept of playing just one game at a time on my Xbox. I haven’t played games like this since before I left for college and, now that I think about it, I used to play just one game at a time back then as well. Hmm…

I’m a bit exhausted from playing the entire Green Day American Idiot album for the corresponding challenge in Green Day Rock Band, but I enjoyed getting through the entire thing. At this point, I’ve become moderately good at Hard mode, so Medium goes very smoothly for me and is so nice and relaxing that I can just let the rest of the day float from my fingers with every strum.

Despite all this Rock Banding, I managed to write 707 words tonight (buoyed his spirit in just a few minutes). I kept trying to stop, but each time I’d pause to make some notes on what I would write for tomorrow, the notes came out as full prose and I’d continue for another sentence and another and another. You can never write too much, though, so it’s just 707 steps closer to getting a final project.

I can’t believe it’s been six months that I’ve been actively writing and four months of writing every single day, rain or shine, want or not, deal or no deal. It’s been a pleasant, although daunting, experience and I’m glad I’ve undertaken this task this year. I do worry a bit, however, about what I’ll do with myself once I have a draft complete. Perhaps, I’ll set the goals a little higher with editing two or three pages each night and then blogging about that. Who knows.

Well, now I’m really exhausted and, seeing as how I’m reaching that level of fatigue where it hurts to sit upright and hurts to breathe, I think I’ll check out for the night.

One last note about movies though: I watched Toy Story 3 last night, and I believe that this one is probably my favorite of the trilogy (that I hope remains a trilogy and doesn’t go into the whole “Bonnie” grows up storyline or into a bunch of Andy/Bonnie playing with the toys as animated shorts). I have to say, I haven’t cried so much in a kid’s movie since the end of The Iron Giant, let alone any other movie…probably just ET brought out the same level of lachrymal fluid…

 

Family Sunday, May 8, 2011

What a nice Mother’s Day this was!

I went to church today, reasonably close to on time, sing in the choir and then took a trip to go see my grandmother. On top of getting the added bonus of the long drive I’ve been wanting in my new car, I got to see both aunts and one first cousin and my grandma. I hadn’t seen them in such a long time and as always, we had what I can only describe as a jovial time together.

One of the more memorable moments of the day for me was going to my grandma’s living room to see the old pictures of her parents she had hanging. I love looking at the photos and seeing how similar I look to my great-grandmother. We all look fascinatingly like her, so I’m not sure why I’m so surprised that my second and third cousins and I all look so much alike.

Anyway…enough nostalgia…

I wrote 576 words tonight (though he friended her nonetheless) and must get some work done for first-job or else there really will be hell to pay come tomorrow.

But first, I feel a bout of procrastination and The Sims 2 coming…

 

Ask Me Anything Monday, May 2, 2011

Filed under: Writing — kaitco @ 11:59 pm
Tags: , , , , ,

by The Strokes ~ First Impressions of Earth

As I opened this post, the title song was playing and the specific words “I’ve got nothing to say.” are quite fitting for how I feel about this post.

My sleep pattern is completely off kilter now that I’ve been getting up early in the morning, to the point that I can no longer stay and do what I really ought to do. Tonight, I simply put myself to bed for about an hour since it was apparent that nothing else was going to happen tonight unless I got some kind of nap.

Anyway, I wrote 556 words tonight (As long as you don’t cry wolf on me) and I didn’t really want to stop, but this post is late as it is and I knew I didn’t have much else to say tonight…

 

256 Thursday, April 28, 2011

I’ve not been sleeping well these past few nights and it seems to have all caught up with me in the last twenty minutes. Nevertheless, I did manage to write a little.

I signed all the loans for my car today. It was simultaneously an amazing and an ignorant decision. Where do I get off borrowing 15K for some little thing to take me back and forth to work and church?? On the other hand, just the thought of my current/old car is enough to drive me into a depression. Though I’ve not driven the new car yet, I’m already in love with it.

I’ve decided to change the second book Damen and Brit read together from Their Eyes Were Watching God to A Raisin in the Sun instead. I’ve not read Their Eyes in a long time and, while the story is great, I realize I’ll have more to say about the play than the novel…

…hmmm. Just realized that that change kind of mucks up a previous conversation between Damen and Corey which leads to a big revelation about Corey. Oh well…I suppose I’ll make it work somehow.

I still haven’t figured out how Dana Barrington fits into the latter half of the story, but I’ll add the play to the now growing list of inconsistencies with the novel that I’ve got to fix.

I wrote 256 words tonight (when you live two seconds away.) and because of my extreme fatigue, I really wanted to just let this night go and not write at all. In the end, however, I looked at the date on my laptop clock and said to myself, “Are you really going to let almost 90 days of consistent writing go to waste like that?” So, I wrote a little and brainstormed some more. I’ve got even more to “correct” in the book, but at least I’m recognizing my issues before half a chapter goes by and I’m left to really correct the book.

 

Time crunch Saturday, March 5, 2011

On days like today, the last thing I really want to do is write. I ran into this a lot in February, but last month I only had to get to 100 words which is barely a couple of paragraphs. Now, I have to have some idea of where I’m going with this part of the story to avoid unnecessary prose or dialogue and I have to hit 250 words and I have to do so in usually less than a half hour, since I normally procrastinate and wait to write until my daily alarm warning me to write rings.

I like writing under the time crunch, though. It keeps me focused on the task at hand and allows me to draw from the pressure to create some interesting stuff. I’ve always written this way. I got most of Evan done in late 1999 because I wanted it finished before the new millennium, I finished the first swing at Alex late August 2002 because I wanted it finished before I went off to school and Flight was finished very close to my birthday in 2007 because I didn’t want to turn a year older without fully completing it. I’ve set similar goals like this for Damen, but I have yet to fulfill them since the time crunch really wasn’t a crunch. There was nothing to signify whether I had succeeded or failed; just my own sense of self-satisfaction, which for the last few years, hasn’t carried me far.

Currently, I’m on the cusp of a promotion at first-job and a ton of change will come with it. So much so, that I haven’t been in the mood to do much thinking in the evenings; just play Guitar Hero/Rock Band or just play sims. The time crunch, however, has kept me writing and thinking even when the right side of my brain protests and complains of fatigue or general sloth.

Tonight I managed 324 words (closing the phone and heading back to the house) and I was half into sleep-write mode while I was writing since my contacts are drying and I just want to roll up in my blanket and rest for eternity, but I made it to goal for another night and, for that, I’m grateful.

 

Fukai Mori (Deep Forest) Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Filed under: Writing — kaitco @ 11:42 pm
Tags: , , , , , ,

~ Do As Infinity (2nd InuYasha ending theme)

I went home early from first-job today out of complete exhaustion and pain. I tried not to sleep because I haven’t been sleeping well and I didn’t want to sleep all day, only to screw up my already haphazard sleep schedule. It didn’t matter though; I ended up writing a little, watching InuYasha a little and sleeping a lot.

I’m still wretchedly exhausted. I just wanted to finish this chapter, but I’m so tired that I’m starting to feel that ache that runs through my body when I hit my limit.

Throughout all of today I managed to write 2505 words (wondered if Zach had been shooting his entire life.), but still didn’t finish Chapter Ten.

Maybe tomorrow…

 

Chapter Nine Thursday, January 13, 2011

Filed under: Writing — kaitco @ 11:59 pm
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

…not bankruptcy.

I knew this chapter was going to be a doozy since I saw that it was a rather large file, without even going into the gritty edits, but after reading through what I had for Nine and Ten, I actually feel a lot better about what’s coming.

Normally, I read what’s ready to edit in a new chapter and I want to quit before I even get started. Today, however, I’m pleasantly surprised.

I managed to finish Chapter Eight, after midnight, writing until it became difficult to see. I completed 1717 words to finish Chapter Eight and then came home tonight and wrote! I ended up writing another 936 words for a total of 2653 in one day. 🙂

I love the end of Chapter Eight. I do this whole blur between Damen reading The Catcher in the Rye and being a part of what he reads. It’s not often I look at something I wrote and say, “Crap! That was awesome!” but the end of Chapter Eight fits that in spades. Hours later, I think I’m still just surprised that it works so well…I only hope others will be able to understand what I wrote. This could very well be a step into written insanity, but awesome written insanity.

I’m about to finish Damen’s musings about Corey, Brian and Zach in Chapter Nine and I just finished adding Corey’s rant about the 2008 candidates. Huckabee was the hardest to add. I thought Obama would be the most difficult since I had to make sure Corey noted that he was a poor choice, but not immediately because of race, but my own voice came out in Corey and the Obama rant went without pausing my fingers. Poking fun at Huckabee, however, proved far more difficult. I settled with “Huck-a-what!” but it was between that and “Huck-a-bee better to sit down” and thought the former made a little more sense.

I had a great day today! I finished a chapter, made it work on time, did some laundry and came home and wrote just like an aspiring writer should.

Now, if I can just make it through Friday…

 

Mmm…writing… Thursday, January 6, 2011

Filed under: Favorite,Writing — kaitco @ 11:56 pm
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

I wrote and edited 783 words tonight, which is really incredible considering that I wrote close to a hundred words while half asleep and didn’t think I’d get passed fifty words tonight.

It’s hard to really grasp why I wouldn’t want to write anything when I devote so much of time thinking about the craft and my plans with it. Not a week goes by where I don’t add another entry to my “Book ideas” note on my iPhone and daydream about my own characters on my way to and from my first job.

I often think about whether Damen would have embraced a Kindle or if he would have remained true to paper books. It is very rare that I don’t try to picture Luka as best I can and identify things that make him too similar to Damen and ways I can change that. Today, my aunt even told me how much she likes reading Flight now that she’s started it while at my own Nana’s. The craft is a part of my very being…so how can I reach a point in the day where I grumble, “I just don’t want to…”?

It defies any logic and while I’d like to just blame the first job, I can’t help thinking that I never had these problems while trying to write Flight. I finished the 450K-word novel in less than two years, but here I am rounding the corner on Year 4 of Damen and I’m still in “I just don’t want to” phase. Back then, I even had to teach myself to give up drinking so that I had the capacity to write in the evenings instead of fall asleep after a light buzz, but all I really wanted to do tonight was cuddle in my blanket and watch “Seinfeld.”

Once I got the juices flowing (and hit a more planned part of the novel), I got a partial second wind, but I don’t I’ll write another word tonight; perhaps it’s real fatigue since I’m getting that pang in my stomach that starts when my body is too tired to stay upright, or maybe it’s just plain laziness.

Either way, at least I got in some writing tonight. Tomorrow’s another day.

 

 
%d bloggers like this: