I am kaitco

a writer's log

All Ones’ Day Friday, November 11, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — kaitco @ 12:13 am

I suppose I should have done something special today since it’s rare to have a day be all the same number, but I didn’t. I was going to use my last day of vacation to do something special since I’ve not felt up to it for the past week or so, but I didn’t. My “Oh well” attitude reared again and I spent the rest of the day trying to fix my Sims 2 game. Instead of uninstalling the entire game again and the reinstalling everything, I just installed the stuff packs and I thankfully have my game working…for now. I’m very hesitant to play any of the important families because I fear destroying my game, but for now, it looks like it is okay.

Something interesting did happen today that required my “Oh well” attitude to give me ease. I logged onto my desk for first-job just to check my email. In going through the 300 e-mails that awaited me, I grew sick again. And not just a runny nose or something; I felt like I did on Saturday and thought that Round 2 of this illness was beginning. It’s just amazing what first-job will do to me.

The thought of having to return to first-job tomorrow has made me literally ill. A dozen odd thoughts ran through my head as I considered any alternatives. I could somehow go on disability, but then I really couldn’t afford the pay cut. I could quit my job, give up a lot of my things and go on welfare like JK Rowling did so I, too, could get my book written, but I’d never survive in the hood and the change would probably keep me from writing anything significant. I could just give up on everything and move back in with my parents, but that would just make want to kill myself. I could just plain kill myself, but there’s just too much unknown to make that at all comfortable.

All of this just from the thought of having to go back to first-job. Yikes.

The rest the day was spent watching episodes of Family Matters, my torrent finally completing; I’d actually watched the last few minutes of it since I was so excited. The quality of the episodes is crap, but the fact that I can watch is all I need. My favorite part is the audience track. I’d forgotten that audiences used to do the “Aww…” at all the right moments and that these episodes used to be so sanctimonious with such a moral at the end of each show. God, I miss that in television. Instead, today we have Dangerous Housewives and eight million reality shows. I think the only way for TV to save itself is to find its morals again. I think laughing with Urkel is probably one of the best ways that can happen.

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