The other day, I heard my employees talking about Words With Friends and it occurred to me that they must all be friends on Facebook. I could not help, however, being a little hurt to realize that they all seemed to be Facebook friends, but were not friends with me. I know this is because, regardless of how friendly, amiable and open I try to be, I’m still their boss, with “control” over whether they get raises or remain employed.
In realizing all of this, I grew a little disgusted with myself because I don’t remember it being this way several months ago, but it’s a fact that I’ve got to get over if I expect to do anything with my life. As long as I continue my career at first-job, I’ll be someone’s boss and I can’t blame them for occasionally treating me like such. I know I most likely would not add my own boss as a friend on Facebook and I’ve declined friend requests from other past employees as well (though I’m a bit unsure why anyone would want to be Facebook friends with someone who fired them).
I suppose it’s just a bit jarring to realize that you’re one of “them” now. I’m one of the bosses. A part of it feels okay, but mostly the idea of it makes me a little queasy.
I think it comes as such a surprise to me because most of my employees are around my own age, so I don’t feel like the old mother hen over her chicks. In fact, with several of them, it’s a balance between remaining the “superior” and still respecting those are far older than me. It all goes back to adulthood jumping from out of nowhere to surprise me, I guess.
I wrote 588 words today (Why didn’t you just stay on the curb) and I’m finally starting to believe this book may get done after all. I remember writing the notes for scene I finished tonight years ago and I remember thinking that the scene had to take place much “later” in the book. Character personalities would have to have been established and a hint of the underlying message (for lack of a better word) would need to be already present in order for the scene to work…and yet it’s been done.